Talking in the Cinema Just Got a Whole Lot More Dangerous
Sep 2012 18

Picture the scene:

You’ve had a hard day at work and fancy going to the cinema to unwind. Once you and your friend arrive and buy your tickets, you settle down in your seats with your loud sweet bags, which are scientifically-optimised to make as much rustling when touched as possible.

You then get your phone out to make sure it’s on loud; you don’t miss any important texts from your friends, and need it close by to tweet your every inane opinion (“Jony Dep is so fitt LOL”).

Finally, you lubricate your vocal chords to make sure that you can talk as loudly as you can for as long as possible. After all, what’s the point of going to the cinema if not to talk over the film you and everyone around you has just paid to see?

If this is you, I have a message for you: you are ruining the cinema experience for everyone around you.

And you are a dick.

Aha!

The Prince Charles Cinema in London’s Leicester Square has a novel response to this phenomenon: ninjas.

So, back to the initial scenario: no sooner have you turned to your friend to declare the movie “boring” and “too talky” (30 seconds after the start, natch), you feel a soft breeze on your face, as, out of thin air, three black-clad, faceless martial artists descend upon you. In a non-confrontational, friendly but firm, way, the Cinema Ninjas explain that you are being inconsiderate, and are ruining other people’s experience. Since you are so flabbergasted, you simply nod mute acquiescence, and proceed to allow your fellow patrons to enjoy the film as the three spectral ninjas dissolve into the darkness.

Such a satisfying image

The PCC has long been a great place to watch movies in London. With their astoundingly low prices (especially considering their central location), great cult film viewings, and passionate staff, catching a film there is always a pleasure. In their quest to improve the cinematic experience still further, theirĀ morphsuit-clad ninjas innovate in the never ending battle against what is often the worst part of modern cinema viewing: inconsiderate audience members. If that isn’t a good advert for the cinema (at the very least, a damn good publicity stunt), I don’t know what is. I say good on the PCC for clamping down on that rude minority, saving cinema for the rest of us!

TA

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